maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I am one with the molecules
Bring me that man meat
Randomize
