I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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