we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
