Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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