If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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