Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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