and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
