you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize