The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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