I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I am naked and annoyed.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
