This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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