Christians are straight up FREAKS
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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