just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
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