so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
