omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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