I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
