Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
