You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
