Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
