The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
