She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
no, he came in my armpit
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize