did you get engaged???
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
