Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
