How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
