isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
