doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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