I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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