Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
