It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Life is so much better after having sex.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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