I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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