i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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