I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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