so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize