i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
