Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize
