It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
