OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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