Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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