even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Is it penis luge time yet?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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