Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
