absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
