I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
