dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
