I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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