Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
