dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I didn't shave. On purpose
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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