Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
