Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
