And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
