I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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